Top 5 Moustaches of All-Time

Fuck, shit, cock, ass, bitch, piss, tits, Bob Saget. . . God dammit I wish I could grow a sweet stache. These are my top 5 staches of all-time. I know some of these are rather obvious, but the beauty of these moustaches cannot be denied.

5. Steve Prefontaine
4. Burt Reynolds
3. Rollie Fingers
2. Tom Selek
1. Jason Schwartzman (The Darjeeling Limited)

Yes Mr. Selek, you have been dethroned. You had a good run. A solid 20 years of stache dominance. Mad props sir. Sorry.

Just watched The Darjeeling Limited and it was pretty good. Most definitely required viewing. Jason Schwartzman's moustache was gorgeous. Words cannot describe how beautiful his stache was in this flick. Fucking epic stache. If I could grow a stache half as good, I would rule the world. Say what you will about moustaches, but the fact of the matter is they make panties drop like two beers and a vicodin.

This is what I would look like if I was capable of producing a significant amount of testosterone:

Compliments of Pet Moustache.