Emerald City Roller Girls: Concrete Jungle

Saturday, saturday, saturday at the Lane County Fair Grounds. Hot roller derby action. Your Emerald City Roller Girls will be in action along with the Coos County Roller Girls. BE THERE!

For real though, all I ever here after a bout is, "Jake, why didn't you tell me there was a bout? I really need to check one of these things out! What the fuck man?"

Well, here it is. You have been informed, so don't come at me with that ish next week unless you want to be slapped in the tits. Go get your tickets pronto because these things are selling like hot cakes. Tickets can be had on their website, at Fastlane Coffee, or through me possibly, so holler at'cha boy. Get 'em well the gettin' is good folks. These suckers won't last.

A good time will be had by all. That is a guarantee! Dope tunes. PBR tall cans. Scantily clad ladies beating the shit out of each other, and hopefully not me. What more can you ask for?

Unsatisfied customers will be allowed to kick me square in the baby maker.

I love you.